That's right, plural. I've got more than one today.
First off...I want to get it out of the way that Jen from PeopleIWantToPunchInTheThroat.com is at the very top of my Chopee list. I hate her. I mean, really I flipping LOVE her. She is an incredibly funny woman...she makes me laugh hysterically, and the similarities between us are uncanny. But thats why she deserves a throat chop. Number one, the world really can't handle more than one of us, and I feel like she's stepping on my toes. And number two, an increasing number of people think that my Throat Chop is a copy cat of her Throat Punch...but those who know me, know that I was threatening to cause damage to random people's trachea long before I ever knew she existed. Seriously, you should check out her blog, it's awesome...just don't accuse me of stealing any of her crap. I didn't ask for her to be like me.
Second...the next mother-loving person who asks me when I'm going to have a baby is going to get it. Seriously. Some little old lady in my office this morning was all "how old are your kids, honey" which I HATE when people ask me that, because when I answer it is very evident that I am not old enough to be their mother, which then requires me to go on to the explanation that they are technically my step-children. I abhor the term "step-children"...so I really don't like it when I'm backed into a corner and have to call them that.
And then, after I say they are my step-kids, always comes the next question "well don't you want one of your own?!?!?!"
Of course I do. Because it is completely and totally incomprehensible that I might be happy with my life, and happy with my children just the way it is? My kids are almost grown, and are all pretty much independent of me. They have their own likes and dislikes, their own social lives, their own...everything. They are at the age where we get to be more like friends and less like they need us for every single waking moment of their lives. I am perfectly ok with never changing another diaper as long as I live. AND...as a bonus, my kids will all be grown and out of the house by the time I am 34 years old. Yeah...I'm pretty sure I'm ok with things just the way they are.
It just really flippin irritates me that people automatically make assumptions about others. What makes them not my own? The fact that we don't share DNA? That is the sole determining factor in a person either being a parent, or not being a parent? So I suppose that means all the people out there who have adopted children, they aren't really parents. My dad obviously isn't really my dad. My bio-mom's dad isn't her dad either.
When you think of it that way, there are a lot of poor kids out there who don't have any parents at all, since people who aren't blood related can't really be a parent.
No...I am damn tired of people misunderstand my life. I am not missing anything. Have I often yearned for the experience of pregnancy, and having an infant? Of course...I am a woman, that is what we are made for. But that doesn't make me any less appreciative of my family.
And my kid's aren't missing anything either. They have a rare thing going for them...they don't just have one mom. Or a mom and a step-mom. They have two mom's who would both lay down their life to protect them. We would both give anything to see them succeed and be happy in their life. We have both given and sacrificed of ourselves to give them the life that they deserve. No, they didn't come from my body...that is a bond that they share with their mom, and their mom alone. But that doesn't mean that I don't love them with every fiber of my being.
I don't understand why, after EIGHT YEARS, I am still having this argument and having to explain myself to people. I wish I was older, or looked older...because maybe then it wouldn't cause such a controversy when I say that my daughters are about to be 17 and 15 years old.
No comments:
Post a Comment